“Guaranteed To Get You Laid” Lasagna

That’s right.  This lasagna is “Guaranteed To Get You Laid.”  This is another Matty Matheson recipe.  We saw it on YouTube and I had to try it.  What do you mean this is the way Italians should make lasagna?  This is blasphemous.  I couldn’t resist the temptation.

My mouth is still watering thinking about the recipe.  I will admit it was even better the next day as leftovers.  This is a completely new way of making lasagna for me.  There’s definitely a little more cheese than I’d like and this is definitely not the healthiest recipe in this blog.  But we all have our cravings and addictions- mine is cheese.

Check out his video here.  He’s hilarious.  You should definitely watch it.  Again, I guessed at his proportions and tried (?) to make it a little healthier.  Mine was definitely not dripping oil like his was…

“Guaranteed To Get You Laid” Lasagna


  • 2 pounds ground beef
  • 6 cloves garlic, diced then crushed (you have to watch his method in the video)
  • 1 large onion, diced
  • 1 medium-sized carrot, peeled and shredded (again- watch his method)
  • 1/4 cup coconut oil
  • 1/4 cup tomato paste
  • 1 tablespoon red pepper flakes
  • 3 cups beef stock
  • 2 cups almond milk
  • 3 egg yolks
  • 3 tablespoons+ chopped parsley
  • 1 box gluten free lasagna noodles (ones you don’t have to blanch)
  • 2 large logs of mozzarella (or at least 3 balls)
  • dash pepper
  • 2 tablespoons parmesan


  • Heat a large pot over medium-high heat.  Crumble the ground beef in the pan and cook until no longer pink.
  • Meanwhile, heat the coconut oil in a medium-sized saucepan.  Once hot, add the garlic and onions.  Cook until translucent.  Add the carrots.  Let this cook down.  Add the tomato paste.  Mix to combine.  Add pepper flakes and mix again to combine.  Again, let that cook down and let the flavors marry.  You should end up with almost a burnt-red color.
  • Add the tomato paste and veggie mixture to the cooked beef.  Mix to combine.  Then add the beef stock and mix again.  Let that cook down (bring to a boil, then simmer)- this takes quite a long time.  Check on it every now and then and stir.  Reduce it until you have a sauce-like consistency.  You don’t want it watery.  Add 1 cup of the almond milk, mix, and allow it to reduce again.  Then add the 2nd cup of milk and continue to allow it to reduce.  (This is a long process, but worth it)  Remove from heat.
  • Preheat your oven to 350 degrees F.
  • Add your three egg yolks into the meat “sludge” one yolk at a time.  Each time you add a yolk, stir it to combine it into the mixture, otherwise the yolk will cook and you’ll just end up with a cooked egg yolk in your lasagna.
  • In a large baking dish, cover the bottom with a bit of the meat mixture.  Press a layer of lasagna noodles, another layer of meat mixture, then cheese.  Repeat this process until you have no remaining meat sauce.  Once you’re coming to the end, make sure you add some parsley on top of the sauce in one of the last layers.  Continue to press the layers down as you add more in order to incorporate all the ingredients- this will also help the cooking process of the noodles.  Top with fresh cracked pepper and parmesan.
  • Place in oven and cook, uncovered for 45 minutes.  Check throughout after 30 minutes as you don’t want the top to burn.  You’re looking for brown, crisp edges.  Once finished, top with fresh parsley. Serve and enjoy!

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